And it wasn't terrible. I had a few moments of feeling lonely and sad but I'm OK for now. The big melt down came when I was outside getting some basil for pesto an the HOA president just happen to walk by and he was a huge ass about our tomato plants. I wanted to fucking scream but instead I bawled my eyes out. Luckily my nice neighbor was outside for this show and I think she felt bad for me and we talked for a minute.
I read a bunch of military wives blogs today and I'll admit I feel a little spoiled. My husband isn't gone for 15 months at a shot and hell even if he was he'd probably be in an office building somehwere instead of kicking in doors. I don't have kids to worry about and raise on my own. I read one woman's bog and one of her kids is lashing out becuse he doesn't understand why his dad has to go away so often. I bet any of these women would trade places with me. The first one is always the hardest I guess and this first week will be rough. This week will be the hardest because it's right before everything happens with the job and visiting NJ and what not. I just have nothing else to focus on this week and that's tough. I think eventually the time will go by quickly but right now it feels very lonely.
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